210 Questions to Ask Your Friends for Deeper Friendships
It’s no secret that friends can significantly impact your life.
Great friends can make you laugh, lift you up when you’re down, and be there for the most important moments of your life.
Were you aware that your friendships can also influence your happiness?
According to a growing body of research, close friendships can make you happier and healthier.
Getting to know someone means figuring out questions to ask your friends! These can lead to more interesting conversations and deepen your friendships.
How Friendships Impact Our Lives
What makes friendships so important to our lives?
Friends are vital to our existence.
Friends are our confidants with whom we share our most private information, including our earliest memory, most embarrassing moment, dream job, and bucket list items.
Friends make us laugh hysterically, sometimes at ourselves and other times at life’s absurdities.
They help us get through the tough times by offering a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen to, or simply being present.
A good friend is essentially a family member that we choose.
And like family members, friends are there for us through the good times and the bad.
While we may not need friends to survive, they certainly make life more enjoyable!
Let’s look deeper into the other wonderful ways friendships improve our lives.
1. Friendships Can Reduce Stress
Having friends is one of the best ways to reduce stress. Studies have shown that people with strong social support systems have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol and are better able to cope with stress.
So, if you’re feeling stressed or anxious, spend quality time with close friends to relax. Having someone to rely on and confide in can make a world of difference.
2. Friendships Can Help You Feel Better
When we’re down, our friends are a great source of comfort and solace; they can even help lift our spirits. Studies show that people who spend more time with friends are happier and more satisfied with their lives.
So, if you’re feeling a bit blue today, spend time with your best friend to lift your spirits.
3. Friendships Can Help You Maintain Your Mental Sharpness
Spending time with friends can help keep your mind sharp as you age. Research shows that social interaction can help protect against cognitive decline and memory loss.
So, if you want to keep your mind agile and alert, make time to hang out with friends.
4. Friendships Can Lead to a Longer and Healthier Life
Friendships are good for our health. Studies have shown that people with strong social relationships have a 50% lower risk of death than those without. Friendships have been linked to lower blood pressure, a stronger immune system, and increased overall longevity.
So, if you want to live a long and healthy life, nurture your friendships!
The Art of Asking Questions: Deepening Your Friendships
Perhaps the best way to nurture your friendships is to spend time with your best friends, asking questions! You can deepen the bond you share by showing a genuine interest in your friends’ lives and engaging in deeper conversations.
If you want meaningful friendships, you need to put in the effort. According to a recent study published in Psychological Science, people who ask more personal questions during conversations are perceived as more interesting and likable.
As a result, these people are more likely to form close friendships.
Why Asking Questions Matters
So, what is it about asking questions that make you more likable?
The researchers of the study mentioned above believe it is related to how we process information.
When we ask questions, we actively participate in the conversation.
This results in a back-and-forth communication flow, which makes the discourse more interesting and stimulating.
When we only make statements, on the other hand, conversations tend to be less fleshed out. This way of communicating keeps discussions at the surface level.
As a result, the conversation may feel one-sided and is far less enjoyable.
The researchers carried out two experiments.
In the first experiment, pairs of random people talked to one another for 10 minutes. People who asked deep questions such as “What is the weirdest thing that ever happened to you?” were found to be more interesting and likable by their conversation partners.
In the second experiment, participants interacted with one another for 30 minutes. People who asked more questions were more likely to report feeling closer to their conversation partners.
Therefore, to have more productive interactions and connect deeply, ask open-ended questions that require more than a one-word answer!
Our Comprehensive List of Questions to Ask Your Friends
To help you foster deeper conversation and strengthen your friendships, here’s a comprehensive list of questions you can ask your friends, categorized by type:
Deep Questions for Thought-Provoking Conversations
Ask these questions for deep conversations about life experiences, values, and personal development.
- What’s your earliest memory?
- What do you like most about yourself?
- What are your desires and passions?
- What’s your favorite holiday, and how do you celebrate it?
- How do you define success in life?
- What makes you feel satisfied and fulfilled in your life?
- What are your future goals and ambitions?
- How do you stay motivated when facing challenges?
- What do you think is the key to maintaining long-lasting friendships?
- What do you value the most about the people in your life?
- How do you balance your personal life with your professional life?
- What would you change about yourself if you could?
- What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make?
- What is the best decision you’ve ever made?
- How do you handle failure or disappointment?
- What’s your definition of true love?
- What are your core values?
- How have your values changed over time?
- What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned from a past relationship?
- How do you think you’ve changed as a person over the years?
- What’s your biggest regret, and how has it shaped you?
- How do you think your childhood has influenced who you are today?
- What’s the most significant lesson you’ve learned in life so far?
- What concerns you most about life?
- How do you think your current actions will impact your future self?
- What do you think is the biggest misconception people have about you?
- How do you define happiness?
- What’s your stance on spirituality or religion?
- How has your view on spirituality or religion changed over time?
- What do you think is the biggest problem facing humanity today?
- How do you think technology will impact our lives in the future?
- What do you think is the biggest ethical challenge facing our generation?
- What do you think is the most important scientific discovery of our time?
- How do you think humanity will evolve in the next 100 years?
- What’s your philosophy on life in one sentence?
- What is the most important thing in life to remember?
- How do you think your life experiences have shaped your worldview?
- What do you believe is the purpose of life?
- How do you want to be remembered?
- What legacy do you hope to leave behind?
Lighthearted and Fun Questions
Ask these questions to add humor and joy to your conversations and create a relaxed and enjoyable atmosphere.
- What’s your favorite animal or pet?
- What’s your go-to karaoke song?
- What’s your guilty pleasure snack?
- What’s your favorite meme?
- What’s your favorite dance move?
- What was your favorite childhood cartoon?
- Who’s your favorite fictional character, and why?
- What’s the most used emoji on your phone?
- What’s your favorite season, and what do you like so much about it?
- What’s your ideal way to spend a day off?
- What’s the funniest viral video you’ve ever seen?
- What’s your all-time favorite movie? What did you enjoy most about it?
- What’s your favorite cuisine?
- What’s the weirdest food combination you enjoy?
- Do you have any hidden talents?
- What’s the most useless talent you have?
- What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?
- What’s the worst gift you’ve ever received?
- What’s the most absurd fashion trend you’ve ever followed?
- What’s your most ridiculous impulse purchase?
- What’s the strangest hobby you can think of?
- What’s the silliest fear you have?
- What’s the most unusual nickname you’ve ever had?
- What’s the most embarrassing song you know all the lyrics to?
- What’s the funniest joke you know?
- What’s the best prank you’ve ever pulled or witnessed?
- What’s the strangest dream you’ve ever had?
- What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?
- What’s the strangest thing you believed as a child?
- What’s the funniest autocorrect fail you’ve experienced?
- What’s the weirdest dream job you had as a child?
- What’s the most ridiculous superstition you believe in?
- What’s the most embarrassing item you own but can’t get rid of?
- What’s the silliest argument you’ve ever had?
- What’s the funniest misunderstanding you’ve ever had?
- What’s the funniest way you’ve ever injured yourself?
- What’s the strangest talent you wish you had?
- What’s the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you?
- What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done?
- What’s the most profound realization you’ve had that came from a humorous situation?
Engaging Conversation Starters
Use these questions to kickstart interesting conversations and help you learn more about your friends’ perspectives and experiences.
- How would your closest friends and family describe you in five words?
- What’s your favorite family tradition?
- What’s your favorite sport to watch or play?
- What’s the most memorable concert you’ve ever attended?
- What type of music has the biggest impact on your mood?
- Who do you think is the best movie villain, and why?
- What’s the most interesting book you’ve read lately?
- What’s your favorite way to express your creativity?
- What languages do you speak or would you like to learn?
- What’s the most interesting or unusual job you’ve ever had?
- What’s the most fascinating fact you know?
- What’s the most unusual hobby you’d like to try?
- What’s the most interesting podcast you’ve listened to?
- What’s the most memorable meal you’ve ever had?
- What skill do you wish you had learned earlier in life?
- What’s the most valuable skill you’ve taught yourself?
- What’s the most interesting place you’ve ever visited?
- What’s the most breathtaking place you’ve ever seen?
- What are your top three bucket list items?
- What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever experienced?
- What’s the most adventurous thing you’ve ever done?
- What’s the most challenging thing you’ve ever accomplished?
- What book has influenced you the most?
- What’s your favorite quote, and why does it resonate with you?
- What’s the most beautiful piece of art you’ve ever seen?
- What’s the most interesting historical event you’ve learned about?
- What’s the most thought-provoking documentary you’ve watched recently?
- What topic could you give a 20-minute presentation on without any preparation?
- What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
- What’s the most valuable life lesson you’ve learned from a mistake?
- What’s the most interesting cultural tradition you’ve experienced?
- How and where did your parents meet?
- Who’s your biggest role model, and why?
- What’s the most valuable life lesson you’ve learned from a family member?
- What do you consider your secret weapon or best quality?
- What’s the most inspiring TED talk or speech you’ve ever heard?
- What’s a cause you’re passionate about?
- What’s the most interesting scientific discovery you’ve heard about recently?
- How do you think we can make a positive impact on the world?
- What’s the most surprising thing you’ve learned about yourself recently?
Questions About Personal Growth and Self-Reflection
Ask these questions to encourage introspection and help your friends explore their personal growth, goals, and values.
- What’s your favorite childhood memory?
- Did you ever have an imaginary friend growing up?
- How would you describe your younger self?
- What’s a challenging experience that has shaped who you are today?
- Are you a night owl or a morning person?
- Would you describe yourself as more of an organized or spontaneous person?
- Do you consider yourself superstitious in any way?
- What’s your biggest pet peeve?
- What’s your deepest fear?
- What’s a bad habit you’re trying to break?
- How do you practice self-care?
- What’s your go-to method for handling stress or anxiety?
- How do you typically respond to criticism?
- What qualities do you value most in a romantic partner?
- What do you consider a deal-breaker in relationships?
- What’s the most valuable lesson you’ve learned from past relationships?
- How do you nurture and maintain meaningful friendships?
- What personal boundaries have you set that have improved your life?
- How do you balance staying true to yourself with meeting others’ expectations?
- What do you consider your greatest personal accomplishment?
- What’s the biggest risk you’ve ever taken?
- Tell me about a time when the bad news you received actually turned out to be good news!
- What strongly held belief have you changed your mind about?
- How do you personally define success?
- What’s your approach to problem-solving?
- How do you stay motivated when working towards long-term goals?
- What strategies do you use to maintain a work-life balance?
- How do you practice gratitude in your daily life?
- Talk about a situation that you’re surprisingly grateful for.
- What do you think are your best qualities?
- What fear have you overcome, and how did you do it?
- What positive habit have you developed that has significantly improved your life?
- How would you define personal growth?
- What area of your life would you most like to improve?
- What new skill are you most interested in learning?
- What’s your biggest personal goal for the next five years?
- How do you maintain a positive mindset during challenging times?
- What’s the most significant change you’ve made in your life recently?
- How do you define your personal values?
- What steps are you taking towards self-improvement?
Hypothetical Scenarios and What-Ifs
Ask these imaginative questions to encourage creative thinking and reveal your friends’ preferences and values.
- If you could choose your own nickname, what would it be?
- If you could have a theme song play every time you entered a room, what would it be?
- If you could create a new flavor of ice cream, what would it be?
- What would you want to see if you could have any view from your window?
- What would you choose if you could have any animal as a pet (real or mythical)?
- If you could have dinner with any cartoon character, who would it be?
- If you could have any celebrity’s wardrobe, whose would you choose?
- What sport would you compete in if you could be in the Olympics?
- If you could have any accent in the world, which would you choose?
- If you could have a lifetime supply of one food, what would it be?
- If you could instantly become fluent in any language, which would you choose?
- If you could travel to any planet in the solar system, which one would you visit?
- If you could have any animal’s ability, what would you choose?
- If you could star in any movie remake, which movie and role would you choose?
- Who would you choose if you could have any famous person narrate your life?
- If you could design your dream house, what unique features would you include?
- If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you choose?
- Who would you choose if you could have any fictional character as your best friend?
- If you could live in any fictional universe, which would you choose?
- If you could bring back any extinct animal, which would you choose?
- If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be?
- If you could have any job in the world, regardless of qualifications, what would it be?
- If you could have a conversation with any celebrity, who would it be, and what would you discuss?
- If you were a superhero, what would your costume and powers be?
- If you could experience one day in someone else’s body, whose would it be and why?
- If you could switch lives with anyone for a day, who would it be?
- Who would you be if you could be any character in a book?
- If you could have a conversation with any inanimate object, what object would you choose?
- If you could create a new holiday, what would it celebrate?
- If you could have any superpower, what would it be, and how would you use it?
- If you could live in any era of history, when would you choose?
- What would you choose to see if you could witness any historical event?
- If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would it be and why?
- If you could relive one day of your life, which day would you choose?
- If you could change one decision from your past, what would it be?
- If you could have a conversation with your younger self, what advice would you give?
- If you could meet your future self, what would you ask them?
- If you could change one thing about your personality, what would it be?
- If you could change one major historical event, which one would it be and why?
- If you could be famous for one thing, what would you want it to be?
- If you could be an expert in one field, what would it be?
- If you could start a business, what kind would it be?
- If you could invent something to make your life easier, what would it be?
- If you could have any book or movie plotline come true in your life, which would it be?
- If you could start a charity, what cause would it support?
- If you could leave one message for future generations, what would it be?
- If you could create a new law, what would it be?
- If you could solve one global problem, what would it be?
- What would you ask if you could have any question answered with 100% truth?
- If you were granted one wish, what would you wish for?
Final Thoughts
Friendship is a fundamental human need that is essential for happiness.
According to the Harvard Grant Study, “The single most important determinant of whether people (are) happy and satisfied in life (is) the quality of their relationships.”
This makes sense when you consider that humans are social animals by nature. We need friends to share our lives with, laugh with, and cry with.
Fortunately, cultivating relationships doesn’t have to be hard – it just takes some effort. One way to strengthen your friendships is by building good conversational skills and asking your friends deep questions. These questions get your friends thinking about themselves in a new light, which often leads to more trust and closeness.
However, lighter questions are sometimes more appropriate depending on the context and your relationship with the person you’re talking to. (If you want to keep things light, our funny questions article is a great resource!)
No matter what type of question you choose to ask, always aim to listen attentively without judgment so that your friend feels heard and understood. By engaging in deeper conversations, you’ll strengthen your friendships and gain new insights into yourself and the world around you.
If you want a simple way to deepen your relationships with others, download the Do Happy App! It’ll keep your friendships at the forefront of your mind and make it easy to keep in touch, track important dates, and remember shared memories.
Check out the a little dose of happy blog for more happiness inspiration.
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