Happy Questions to Ask Your Friends

Happy Questions to Ask Your Friends for Deeper Friendships

It’s no secret that friends can significantly impact your life.

Great friends can make you laugh, lift you up when you’re down, and be there for the most important moments of your life.

Were you aware that your friendships can also influence your happiness?

According to a growing body of research, close friendships can make you happier and healthier.

Getting to know someone means figuring out happy questions to ask friends! These can work to deepen your friendships.

Friendships and Happiness

What makes friendships so important to our lives?

Friends are vital to our existence.

Friends are our confidants with whom we share our most private information, including our most embarrassing moment, dream job, bucket list items, and favorite childhood memory.

two smiling classmates talking

They make us laugh hysterically, sometimes at ourselves and other times at life’s absurdities.

They help us get through the tough times by offering a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen to, or simply being present.

A good friend is essentially a family member that we choose.

And like family, friends are there for us through the good times and the bad.

While we may not need friends to survive, they certainly make life more enjoyable!

Let’s look deeper into the other wonderful ways friendships improve our lives.

1. Friendships Can Reduce Stress

hikers having a conversation

Having friends is one of the best ways to reduce stress. Studies have shown that people with strong social support systems have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol and are better able to cope with stress.

So, if you’re feeling stressed or anxious, spend quality time with friends to relax. When you have someone to rely on and confide in, it can make a world of difference.

2. Friendships Can Help You Feel Better

When we’re down, our friends are a great source of comfort and solace, and they can even help lift our spirits. Studies show that people who spend more time with friends are happier and more satisfied with their lives.

So, if you’re feeling a bit blue today, spend time with your best friend to lift your spirits.

female friends laughing

3. Friendships Can Help You Maintain Your Mental Sharpness

Spending time with friends can help keep your mind sharp as you age. Research shows that social interaction can help protect against cognitive decline and memory loss.

4. Friendships Can Assist Us in Living Longer, Healthier Lives

Friendships are good for our health. Studies have shown that people with strong social relationships have a 50% lower risk of death than those without. Friendships have been linked to lower blood pressure, a stronger immune system, and increased overall longevity.

So, if you want to live a long and healthy life, nurture your friendships.

Perhaps the best way to nurture your friendships is to spend time with your friends, asking questions! You can deepen the bond you share by showing a genuine interest in your friends’ lives.

Happy Questions to Ask Your Friends for More Meaningful Friendships

If you want meaningful friendships, you need to put in the effort. According to a recent study published in Psychological Science, people who ask more personal questions during conversations are perceived as more interested and likable.

As a result, these people are more likely to form close friendships.

colleagues discussing while holding tablets

The Importance of Asking Your Friends Questions

So, what is it about asking deep questions that make you more likable?

The researchers of the study mentioned above believe it is related to how we process information.

When we have questions to ask, we actively participate with the person we are conversing with.

This results in a back-and-forth communication flow, which makes the discourse more interesting and stimulating.

When we only make statements, on the other hand, conversations tend to be less fleshed out. This way of communicating keeps discussions at the surface level.

As a result, the conversation may feel one-sided and is far less enjoyable.

The researchers carried out two experiments.

In the first experiment, they had pairs of random people talk to one another for 10 minutes. People who asked deep questions such as “What is the weirdest thing that ever happened to you?” were found to be more interesting and likable by their conversation partners.

In the second experiment, participants interacted with one another for 30 minutes. People who asked more questions were more likely to report feeling closer to their conversation partners.

Therefore, to have more productive interactions leading to deeper friendships, ask deep, open-ended questions that require more than a one-word answer!

friends talking at a picnic table

Happy Questions to Ask Your Friends

Here is a list of 10 deep, open-ended questions to ask your friends:

  1. What do you like most about yourself?
  2. What makes you feel satisfied and fulfilled in your life?
  3. What are your desires and passions?
  4. What are your future goals and ambitions?
  5. What would you change about yourself if you could?
  6. What do you value the most about the people in your life?
  7. What concerns you about life?
  8. What do you believe is the purpose of life?
  9. What is the key to happiness in life?
  10. What do you believe is the most important thing in life to remember?

These questions are designed to make your friends think. They are not easy questions to answer and should lead to more in-depth conversations.

Read on for why these questions are important:

1. What Do You Like Most About Yourself?

classmates discussing notes

This is a great starter question that is positive and open-ended. It allows your friend to share what they appreciate about themselves. It can be a great icebreaker that helps you learn more about what they see as their best qualities.

You can jump in and add your own answer to this question. Being open and honest here will help create a bond between you as you share what you like about yourselves and each other.

2. What Makes You Feel Satisfied and Fulfilled in Your Life?

This question gets at what is important to your friend. It helps you understand what they value and what makes them feel good.

3. What Are Your Desires and Passions?

This is another great question that allows your friend to share what they are passionate about. It gives you a glimpse into their soul and what motivates them.

4. What Are Your Future Goals and Ambitions?

teammates having a conversation

This question helps you understand what your friend is working towards in life. It can be helpful to ask about their long-term goals so you know what they are striving for.

Knowing their answer to this question can help you support them in their pursuits. It can also help you suggest (or avoid) activities or ideas that may (or may not) help them succeed.

5. What Would You Change About Yourself if You Could?

This is an excellent question for helping you understand what your friend doesn’t like about themselves. It can be helpful to know their insecurities so you can be more supportive.

Sharing your own answer to this question can help your friend feel more comfortable sharing their answer with you. By being vulnerable with each other, you can create a stronger connection.

6. What Do You Value the Most About the People in Your Life?

friends wearing birthday hats at a party

This question helps you become a better friend. By understanding what they value in their relationships, you can make sure to provide that for them.

It can also be helpful to share what you value in your relationships. That way, your friend can understand what is important to you and be more supportive.

7. What Concerns You About Life?

This question gets at what is bothering your friend. It can help you understand their current worries and how you can help them.

If you find out your friend is struggling, you can offer support. If you need help with being supportive, read up on how to make someone happy when they are sad.

If you share your own concerns, it can help your friend feel more comfortable sharing their worries with you. Sometimes just knowing that someone else shares similar thoughts is reassuring.

8. What Do You Believe Is the Purpose of Life?

This profound question can help you understand your friend’s values and beliefs.

Even if you don’t share the same beliefs, asking this question can be a great opportunity to learn more about what they believe and why.

Subsequently, having a respectful discussion about your different beliefs can help you better understand each other and gain new perspectives.

Maybe your friend (and you) will say that the purpose of life is to be happy. In this case, you can ask them what makes them happy and pursue more of those activities together!

9. What Is the Key to Happiness in Life?

group of friends taking a selfie

This is a great question to follow up the previous one. It can help you understand what your friend believes is vital for a happy life.

It’s a happy question that can assist you in recognizing what happiness means to others and what you should do to preserve happiness in your own life.

You can also share your own answer to this question. Your answer can help your friend understand what makes you happy and how they can be a part of that.

10. What Do You Believe Is the Most Important Thing in Life to Remember?

In an increasingly chaotic world, pausing and reflecting on what is essential is more valuable than ever. Ask your friends this important question to learn their perspective on what’s important in life.

You may find that your friend has a similar belief to you or that they have a unique perspective that changes the way you think. Either way, this is a great opportunity to learn more about your friend and also how to live a more meaningful life.

Happy Questions to Ask Your Friends to Lighten the Mood

While our previous questions will definitely help you learn more about your friends, sometimes you just want some lighthearted conversation.

friends celebrating a birthday with cake

Here are some of our favorite lighthearted questions to ask:

Conversation Starters

  1. What is your secret weapon or best quality?
  2. Who do you think is the best movie villain, and why?
  3. Name a few of your top 10 bucket list items.
  4. What is the most used emoji on your phone?
  5. How would your other friends describe you in 5 words?
  6. If you were on a deserted island, what three items would you want to have with you?
  7. If you could relive your entire life, what would and would you not do again?
  8. Who is your biggest role model?
  9. What is the strangest thing you’ve ever experienced?
  10. What celebrity would you want to have a conversation with?

Fun Questions to Ask

group of women laughing
  1. What is your favorite movie?
  2. What is your favorite holiday?
  3. What is your favorite animal or pet?
  4. What is your favorite food, and could you eat it for the rest of your life?
  5. What do you like to do when you’re not working?
  6. What is your favorite season and why?
  7. Describe your perfect vacation.
  8. What was the best gift you ever received?
  9. What is the craziest thing that you’ve ever done?
  10. What was your favorite subject in school?
  11. Do you have a sweet tooth, and if so, what treat is your guilty pleasure?
  12. Do you have any hidden talents?
  13. Who is your favorite fictional character?
  14. What is your favorite viral video?
  15. Describe your dream home.
  16. Tell me about your perfect day.

Interesting Questions to Ask

  1. What is your greatest accomplishment, and how did you achieve it?
  2. Are you a night owl or a morning person?
  3. Would you say that you’re a clean or messy person?
  4. Are you a superstitious person?
  5. What is your biggest pet peeve?
  6. What is your biggest fear?
  7. What is your favorite memory from childhood?
  8. Did you ever have an imaginary friend growing up?
  9. Tell me about your younger self.
  10. Where did your parents meet?
  11. Do you have a favorite family tradition?
  12. What qualities do you look for in a romantic partner?
  13. What things did a past relationship teach you that you’re grateful for?
  14. Is there something you consider a relationship deal breaker?
  15. How do you define success?
  16. What is the best advice you’ve ever received?

Final Thoughts

Friendship is a fundamental human need that is essential for happiness.

According to the Harvard Grant Study, “the single most important determinant of whether people (are) happy and satisfied in life (is) the quality of their relationships.”

This makes sense when you consider that humans are social animals by nature. We need friends to share our lives with, laugh with, and cry with.

classmates having a happy conversation

Fortunately, cultivating relationships doesn’t have to be hard – it just takes some effort. One way to strengthen your friendships is by building good conversational skills and asking deep questions that make your friends think about themselves in a new light. These types of questions can help build trust and intimacy between friends.

However, sometimes lighter questions are more appropriate depending on the context and your relationship with the person you’re talking to.

No matter what type of question you choose to ask, always aim to listen attentively without judgment so that your friend feels heard and understood.


If you want a simple way to deepen your relationships with others, download the Do Happy App! It’ll keep your friendships at the forefront of your mind and make it easy to keep in touch, track important dates, and remember shared memories.

Check out the a little dose of happy blog for more happiness inspiration.

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